Young people leaving the church

Young people leaving the church

Parents don't teach their own children in the home. They pass their responsibility to Sunday schools or "youth pastors." They don't make time to have daily devotions. Parents don't follow Deuteronomy 11:18-20 "Therefore shall you lay up these my words in your heart and in your soul, and bind them for a sign upon your hand, that they may be as frontlets between your eyes. And you shall teach them your children, speaking of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. * And you shall write them upon the door posts of your house, and upon your gates" They sometimes speak to their children and teach them, but not every day and not all day. Mom's are out of the homes and turn their children over to other people to raise them. Dad's are working too many hours so they don't have enough time with their children to meet their responsibility. Some Dad's don't even know that they have a responsibility. Some parents don't realize the quality time happens in the middle of huge amounts of ordinary time. Some waste their opportunities for teaching because they don't realize how quickly the years will go by and how important it is to be a ministry saying God's words and doing God's acts and having God's faith in every moment of every day. Some parents don't realize that their main focus of responsibility in life is to minister to their children and to each other.

Parents don't take time to deal with the complexity of the battle that young people will be faced with: Not taking the time to become aware of the many sources of messages that are contrary to the Gospel. Not taking time to find out what those messages are (for example: distortions of history, distortions of what the Bible teaches, evolution, abortion, environmental fear tactics, anti-flood stories, old-earth myths, sexual myths, myths of relativism). Not taking time to find out the real answers to these clever and sometimes complex lies of Satan. Not taking time to teach these things to the children from a very young age.

Lack of unity between the parents. When one attempts to establish the patterns of Scripture in the home, the other mocks, complains, tries to derail the efforts, or resists. Children see this and learn from it. This also disturbs the order and peace of the home and creates an opportunity for Satan.

Fights or disruptions in the home destroy the haven that ought to be in the home. Peace is one of the most important things that anyone, child or parent, can provide for the home.

Some parents become fixated on getting toys and entertainments for themselves and their children and they spend too much time working to earn enough to pay for these toys and this entertainment. This makes it impossible for the parents to meet their real responsibilities.

The break-up of so many homes is definitely a factor. If the parents were doing the things mentioned in this article to take care of their children, there would be fewer break-ups of homes and less stress in the homes.

Parents live two or three lives. They have a church face and a home face. Sometimes they are one person with their children and a quite different person when they think that no one can see it. The trouble is that this takes away their spiritual authority to govern their home according to the power of God's free gift. In times of stress, the children grow up seeing their parents worry, argue, panic, or trying in their own effort rather than turning to God for the leading and the answers to life's problems.

Parents try to self-generate good works rather than seeking God's will, receiving God's faith, allowing faith to give access to God's grace, and allowing God's grace to flow through them in the form of good works, speech, and thoughts. They discipline their children to keep them in line rather than for the purpose of enhancing their relationship with God. They try to get their children to conform by the child's own self-effort rather than as the out-working of the child's faith and the grace of God. This leads to self-righteousness and a lack or real spiritual power for righteousness, healing, health, direction for life, miracles, deliverance, holiness, and redemption (freedom from the sinful nature) in the child. When the child grows to be a young adult, they realize that they are more like the ungodly self-righteous than they are like the members of the Body of Christ.

The Church says we believe the Bible... except for certain parts. Some get rid of creation, the flood, and other historical events recorded in the Bible. Some get rid of God's power for righteousness. Some get rid of power for miracles. Some don't like the manifestation of God in the church when spiritual gifts are imparted to the members. Some get rid of all the things in Scripture (and experience) that tell us that God communicates His will to us in many ways. Some get rid of God's judgment or over-state/misstate it. Some get rid of the restitution of all things. Some get rid of the pattern of Christ's Body in Scripture that don't enhance money, power, prestige, and entertainment and dispose of submission, order, and God's ways of taking care of such things as revelation, finances, worship, and so forth. Some get rid of the personal nature of God's interaction with us until there is emphasis on making sure everyone is having a good time, entertained and intellectually stimulated, rather than in actually connecting with the Spirit of God.

Parents engage in ungodly activities such as unthankfulness. Parents talk down other members of the Body of Christ when they think no one else is listening, but little ears pick it up. They don't yield to the Holy Spirit in every part of their lives. Children see this as they grow up. When they come to the teen years, there are many attacks by ungodly teachers, entertainments, and friends. The young people begin to question and compare the life they have seen in their homes to the things they have been told in whatever teaching they have received. They see hypocrisy and become judgmental.

Children are not given responsibility for ministry at an early age. They have no place of ministry (service) in the weekly service or in the daily devotion. Parents and church leaders lecture too much and don't listen enough. One of the elements that is most poorly taught is the fact that we are all born into the Body of Christ as particular members and that, as members, it is necessary that we fit into our particular places in that Body and build up the Body of Christ by speaking the truth in love as Ephesians 4 and 1 Corinthians 14 indicate.

When the children become young adults and begin to question, the parents panic rather than patiently listening and exploring the answers to the questions with their children. Some young people become angry before they ever say anything since the home is not a place where anyone would talk about their personal experiences with God. The young people clam up, explode in angry attacks, or alternate between both behaviors. Parents don't know how to handle this and don't know that this is the time to listen and be compassionate. Sometimes, other members of the Body of Christ are also not equipped to really listen to the young people with empathy in their hour of doubt.

The complexity of God’s Way understood in a single diagram

Obey your flesh and descend into darkness

How can we know anything about anything? That’s the real question

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